The Second Blog

This is my second blog--three if you count urls alone. I started my first after my mother was given a year to live and my boyfriend of eleven years had left me, after I quit my job to go back to school for my Master's and started seeing a therapist to try to straighten out the mess my life had become. I missed the writing; that is the only way I have ever been able to open myself completely.

I was in the middle of a major transition.

I find myself in the middle of another major transition and I think it's time to close the chapter of my life that is chronicled in my first blog. I think this because I can no longer bring myself to write there. So I've started my second blog.

In my first blog, I struggled with my problems with men (my fear of commitment, my fear of losing myself in someone again, of not maintaining my own life and acquaintances), my role in my mother's (lost) fight against cancer (as her primary caregiver and confidante for two years, trying to establish a life of my own not consumed by the illness), my anger at and distance from the rest of my family, and the grief over my mother's death.

I had that blog for about three years.

My mom died in July 2007. My mother's sister died in November of 2008. My mother's mother is expected to die within the next month or so. I've got all new problems with men--one in particular.